How to Love Big

Reflections on the Teleclass Series

By Rebecca Maillet

In our “LOVE BIG” teleclass series, Gabrielli challenges us to think outside of the “box” regarding love and all the ways that we think of love as a static human condition. She invites us to perceive into our Being, Spirit, and Soul to think of love not only as the acts we do, but also as a Divine Essence that exists in, through, and beyond every experience of being alive. Love, then, is not a condition, or something to step in and out of, but is ever-present. The work comes, then, in recognizing and cultivating this energy in every moment. What if Love is, in fact, as free and alive as the air we breathe? What if this Divine energy is all the inspiration we need in order to act from love and to create loving conditions for ourselves and other beings? What if this Divine Love is not to be earned or deserved, but rather is the omnipresent life force and fuel for human existence?

One would think that if Divine Love was so omnipresent it would be rather easy to step into, to be in and within. But, as we know, acting from and being LOVE can be difficult. It takes practice. It takes attention, intention, and care to arrive there. The great poet, Rilke writes that “Love is perhaps the most difficult task given us, the most extreme, the final proof and text, for which all other work is only preparation.” I love the idea that LOVE is the “final proof and text”–indeed, as Gabrielli’s teachings suggest, LOVE is, and always has been, both our progeny and our legacy. The work now is for us to let it be so.

Importantly, we must remember that we do not need anything else to belong to and be of Divine Love. We are enough. You are enough. “Loving big” has always been our birthright, has always been our truest essence. We do not need anything else except the beings that we already are! If we do not need anything outside of ourselves to love big, and we already are love, then the question becomes, how must our thinking reorient in order be more fully of and within this Divine Love so that we can act more fully from it?

The language of reclaim and proclaim can be helpful here. Can I reclaim myself? What would it look or feel like to reclaim love as the purest expression of my being? What would that feel like in my body? Which negative habits of mind would have to dissolve in order for me to step fully into and proclaim this potency?

Herein lies the work, friends. By understanding how we hurt ourselves in our daily lives we not only make space for bigger love to manifest, but also, then, are better able to feed our own life-source so that we may show up bigger for those struggling around us.

So, here is a little reflection that you might choose to do to proclaim yourself and your intentions to be love more deeply, everyday:

  • Ask: When do I feel small, tight, or distorted? Or, in other words, when do I feel cut off from my love?
  • Reflect on your answers by either writing them down or speaking them out loud to yourself or a partner.
  • Ask: If I were in my highest alignment, what would I see, know, or feel about these moments of tightness? How would I instruct myself to move beyond these feelings of anger, despair, fear, etc.?

Part of this inquiry is intended for us to recognize the shape and tenor of our personal shadows so that we can more consciously and readily move beyond them in our days. Beautifully, when we are in Divine Love we are always in community. We are never alone. We become part of the larger fabric of our world. In this way it becomes such a relief to be in and of love. For to Love Big means to unburden yourself of your own shadows. As the poet Elizabeth Alexander put it in her poem “Praise Song for the Day,” Love, as the “mightiest word,” “casts a widening pool of light.” Let us walk there, together, in that light.

As a community of people from wide-ranging backgrounds, contexts, and identities, it would be difficult to write a meditation that took into account all of the nuanced violences of the exterior world that many of us face, everyday, depending on who we are. So, part of the intention for “loving big” is to simultaneously recognize the ways that we, as individuals, internally hurt ourselves, so that we might reclaim the safety always already within us; by doing this we enable ourselves to show up in more meaningful ways for those around us who might not have the privileges that we do.

As we know, we are all living in a volatile time: the world is reeling with betrayal and violence abounds in myriad forms. In order to be allies to others we must first heal ourselves. What does compassion for yourself feel like, look like? What would it take to belong to your own heart, your own life essence of love?

Let us breathe deeply into our Divine knowing and go step-by-step into recovery, day-by-day.

Thank you for your courage and your LOVE BIG, always.